First of all, I would like to apologize to my readers for not posting any stuffs for the past month. Well, you know, assignments and exams and work, peuhh.. My mind was congested enough with this stuffs that I almost blew my head off and all I wanted to do was have a good sleep, and it didin’t go well, I’m still in sleep deprivation. Basically a walking zombie. Sometimes I just think if I should throw all away, go somewhere, maybe in a cold forest, where people don’t know me and live my life, giving me a fresh start again, back to my authentic true self, the introverted me, the real me, and wander aimlessly getting to know the world. (now I had to wear multiple masks just to blend in for the sake of people around me, and it has successfully sucked half my soul out).
So yeah, coming to the point, about my view of spirituality. When I discovered the true meaning of spirituality at 17 years old, I realised I was already living in that way, but merely following and knowing it, the roots of it. Ever since I was a little hopeless kid who had no idea on what am I going to become in the future, I never was a religious person. I know there is God and he is watching us all out there in someway, or maybe he even resides in us as our best friend, that’s how I use to see God, a part of me and my best friend, even until now. But back then I had little to no knowledge about it. Even know, the my knowledge about it is limited but spirituality is limitless. It teaches about you to you, carve a path specially made for you, will make you aware of yourself and around you. It is a vast topic that cannot be understood in a blink of an eye. The learning period are as long as you are still breathing. It is boundless to materialistic things and earthy feelings. It can be said as a connection with the cosmic and the universe, a connection that will not ever end. Every person has a unique spiritual experience, they will have their own divine timing of circumstances and experience in their lives. In my point of view, spirituality is a key to harness yourself, to acknowledge yourself, to love yourself, to understand yourself, to know the powers you possess, and to know you are a limitless soul travelling in this realms of the Universe. So yeah, some of us will be born gifted with these spiritual phenomenon, but most of us will learn it the hard way. We will start learning when life keeps on kicking us all over the place, where at some point you just wanted to give up, feeling hopeless and not knowing where is your live heading. You feel as if fate has cornered you everywhere that you cannot escape what’s coming towards you like a freaking bullet train, ready to wreck you into pieces. Well, at least that’s how I get it, when it railed me over and over again one after one (pun intended). At one point you will be the most vulnerable, and that’s when the master appear to guide you back on your path.
“When the student is ready, the master appears”
Well, what it means to be ready? When you let go of yourself, you let go of all the earthy attachments and material desires you have in this world. That’s one. Another one is when your body, mind and soul are well aligned, that’s where the positive energies started to come to you. Like attracts like, remember? A master can come in any form, may it be a stranger in an unexpected circumstances, or a repeated angel numbers on your sight, messages in a weird form, maybe in banners and social medias, a calling of an unknown positive entity, or even your own self, the highest self, or might even be from God himself, yeah no kidding. As I said, some will experience it as if they are being served in a silver platter, and some will have to go to the bottom of their lives, beaten and bruised. In my experience, I had went to the point where I felt everything happening in this world and around me was never right and never make any sense till I couldn’t take it anymore and made an suicide attempt, took out a blade and start scratching my arm, and one of the scratch went a little deep (luckily not on the vital nerves) and started to bleed profusely, where I had a panic attack looking at the blood, I rushed to the bathroom to wash it and make the bleeding stop. Somehow after 10 minutes, it stopped, and I looked at myself in the mirror and asked myself, “What I am trying to do”. That’s when a part of me almost felt the fear of death, but at the same time embraced it. Death is inevitable, and once you understand that, live will not be the same anymore, in a good way perhaps. And then I went to bed, looking at my scarred hand (the same hand which was already having scar, thanks to my neighborhood half shepherd breed dog for trying to taste my sweet hands instead punctured it) and went on opening my phone before going to sleep. In my shock, when I opened Instagram, out of nowhere, a picture of the Supreme God of Hinduism, Lord Shiva emerges. The shock was because I never followed any kind of spiritual deity pages. And the picture was in a very calming, safe and protective way of Lord Shiva, as if he directly told me, “I’m with you, don’t worry”. Ever since that day, I started to have a weird and sudden attraction, a heartfelt love towards Lord Shiva and Jesus Christ (I’ve never followed any specific religions tho) as if they are ready to hold my hand and walk with me and it felt like they choose me to be with as natural as it can be. That’s when I realise the meaning of the master will appear when the student is ready. It has a hidden meaning, it is basically telling, when you let go of everything and ready to embrace nothing, the masters will start to appear to teach you about yourself and the governance of the Universe.
Practising spirituality is like growing a tree. You must plant the seed, patiently water it everyday in the right amount, you water less, it’s gonna wilt, you water more, you are going to stall its growth, water it in the right amount, it will grow beautifully, having green leaves and bearing fruits, and it will be healthy and strong for a lifetime. It is like an eye-opening experience( yeah, literally eye opening). When you are practising spirituality, everything will seems weird to you. You’ll start to challenge the status quo. You’ll start to see the other dimension or perspective of live. You will start recognizing that all living beings are one and interconnected. You will start to master yourself with baby steps. You will start seeing things in a positive way. You will start realising that everything happens for a reason, you will start searching for the meaning of life and the truth of the Universe. You will start breaking out of the matrix. You will feel immense love and blissfulness. But that is only if you are ready to go down that path. The path to grow your own Tree of Live within you. Spirituality is not something that can be explained in one phrase, but I’ll try to somehow bind it all together.
Some say that the path of spirituality cannot be chosen, as it will choose the candidates itself to let them experience what is it about. But I say spirituality and humans are no different. We are not humans trying to experience spirituality, but we are spiritual beings trying to explore the human life. Because the things you will go through cannot be withstand by a normal person and the more you are down the path, the more you will start questioning everything around you, as if a baby just seeing the world, as if you are just opening your eyes. Ever realise kids always ask question almost about everything? Because when they were born, they are considered the most enlightened ad innocent beings. They do not know about anything and everything. Humans and animals seems to be so attracted to them due to their divine glow. As they grow up, they will start learning many things, parents and society will start stuffing all of the social norms as they lost their divine connection in the process. Some can just experience it following just the top layer of it, for the purpose of eliminating stress, depression, anxiety and so on. Later on, the more I dwell in the spiritual path, the more I started to realise and things started to unfold. Spirituality is not about getting some superpowers or psychic powers, it is about mindfulness, and more to a self-realization path. It is an art of knowing yourself and the Universe better. It is a way to connect yourself with the cosmic and the higher powers. Yeah maybe some who have attain the spiritual path to a superconscious level may get some powers, but those require strict practices and knowledge and wisdom to use it for the benefit of all without harming any or having any bad thoughts of misusing the powers. But once you went into the spiritual path, all you want and wish are just pure positive intentions of love, peace, kindness and eternal blissfulness. But it do take a lot of time and practice to attain a certain progression in it. There are a lot more that can be discussed regarding this topic and trust me, the list won’t end. This is just a brief journal in a way to let people understand about spirituality, as if it is just a tip of the iceberg. And yeah, if you guys are interested to know more about spirituality, feel free to comment and I might be posting more about it. Also, would love to hear your thoughts as well from those who are more experienced in this. Till then, see ya, love you all… ❤
A Howl of a Wolf 
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